Meditations on Scripture inspired by our experience as an adoptive family.

May these words of my mouth
and this meditation of my heart
be pleasing in your sight,
LORD, my Rock and my Redeemer.
Psalm 19: 14


Saturday, February 18, 2012

Why Can't You See It?


Hear this, you foolish and senseless people,
   who have eyes but do not see,
   who have ears but do not hear:
Should you not fear me?” declares the LORD.
   “Should you not tremble in my presence?  Jeremiah 5:21-22a

“Dylan, can you sound out this word right here?”  The word I was pointing at on the worksheet read pink, and for homework, I was supposed to help him recognize as many “color words” as possible to practice his pre-reading skills.  Dylan looked at the word and with hesitation he sounded it out, making all the right sounds for each letter: “ppp, i, nnn, k.”  “Great!  Now, what color is it?”  I asked filled with joy and anticipation.  “Brown…” Dylan said.  Excitement could be so short lived…

“OK, sound it out again.”  “Ppp, iii, nnn, k.”  “What color is it?”  “Bbbrown?” He said again.  “Do you see any “b” in that word?”  “No.”  He said after examining the word on the paper.  “Then, could it possibly say brown in there without any “bs”?  “No…”  “Then, why did you say brown?”  “I don’t know?”  “Let’s try this again.”  And the next try turned into 15 other tries of more of the same until I gave up in fury and walked away screaming, “why can’t you see it?” 

Steam was coming out of my ears and nose.  Anger was seeping out of every pore.   I walked away and asked Grant to help him before I rupture a vein in my head.  Why can’t he see it?  It is so clear!  Doesn’t he realize that he is saying it?  How come he can’t put the whole picture together?  A great sense of helplessness came over me as I let myself sink in defeat. 

I hit rock bottom deep into my ocean of failure, then I realized that as Christians, sometimes we do just the same.  The reality of Christ is right there in front of us, in plain sight, and we still cannot see it.  We sort of see parts of it, but we fail to see the whole picture.  We can sense it, but we can’t understand it.  We just can’t grasp the truth in what we speak, or read, or see.  And no matter how hard we try, we won’t be able to really see God’s truth and His reality in us, until He dwells in us.  We need the Light so we can see.  Darkness has overcome this world and has blinded too many.  Only Light defeats darkness.  Only the light of Jesus can make darkness flee, so we can finally and clearly see Him standing right in front of us, as our Guide, our Defender, our Redeemer, The Almighty.

Eventually, Dylan will learn how to read, guided by his loving teacher at his school (not by his short-tempered Mother at home), and we’ll all have a good laugh as we remember how out of her mind Mama used to get while trying to help him figure out words.  Eventually, guided by the power of the Holy Spirit and the light of Jesus, we’ll be able to discern the truth of Christ in our lives; and we’ll all tremble at His presence, and wonder how could we have been so foolish that we couldn’t see what was right in front of us.

Scripture to Ponder:  "...the light shines in the darkness, and the darkness did not comprehend it." John 1:5

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